Big Bang Theory-Whimsical Ducks
(dp, dpp, creampie, mast)
(S. 3, Ep. 8 The Adhesive Duck Deficiency. I chose this episode because it has been labeled the best "Shenny" episode...hard to argue.)
Cal Tech nerd scientists Leonard Hofstadter and Rajesh Koothrappali were leaning comfortably back in their folding chairs staring at the night sky when Leonard remarked "too bad Sheldon couldn't come with us."
Raj replied, "yeah, it's just not the same without him."
Then they both broke out in laughter. Truth was they were happy to be without Leonard's pain in the ass roommate: Sheldon Cooper. He was their friend, but sometimes his arrogant, egotistical attitude was nearly too much to tolerate. It was true that he was a bona fide genius, but he was too aware of the fact and made sure everyone else knew it. His attitude could be summed up in one statement he used to reply to Leonard's question, "why do you always assume that your opinion is right?"
Sheldon had responded, "oh, it's not an assumption." That was Sheldon in a nutshell...always right, and everyone else was wrong.
Leonard, Raj and their third party member, Howard Wolowitz had driven into the dessert near Pasadena so that they could photograph the Leonid meteor shower without all the ambient light from surrounding buildings interfering. Howard had gone to "scout out" the other observers in the immediate area; always on the prowl for possible sex partners.
Meanwhile back at the apartment shared by Sheldon and Leonard; Sheldon was attempting to place a phone order for food to be delivered by Siam Palace. He was frustrated because they refused to let him order 1/2 of this or 1/3 of something else.
Suddenly he heard a female voice screaming, "Sheldon...help." Hanging up the phone, he ascertained that the voice was coming from the neighboring apartment, where Leonard's girlfriend Penny resided.
Hurrying to her front door, he knocked as usual: knock, knock, knock, "Penny;" knock, knock, knock, "Penny;" knock, knock, knock, "Penny."
Hearing her distant reply, "Sheldon, help me," he entered her apartment where he heard her more clearly and advanced to her bedroom door.
Knock, knock, knock, "Penny;" knock, knock, knock, "Penny;" knock, knock, knock, "Penny."
"I'm in the bathroom," he heard her pained reply as he entered her bedroom and paused in front of the bathroom door.
"Should I come back at a better time," he asked, staring at the door.
"Get in here...hurry," Penny ordered; and as his hand went to knock, "and don't you dare knock."
Sheldon entered the bathroom and was confronted with the sight of a soaking wet Penny laying in her bathtub covered by the shower curtain that had pulled loose when she fell. His simple response was, "hello."
"I slipped in the tub and I think I dislocated my shoulder," she stated with a grimace.
"Not surprising...you have no safety mat or adhesive stickers," he observed.
"What," she replied incredulously.
"Tubs are slippery. I have a series of whimsical duck stickers on the bottom of my tub," he informed her.
"Would you help me up," she pleaded.
"They're holding umbrellas," he added.
"What," Penny asked, perplexed.
"The ducks in my tub. They're whimsical because ducks have neither the need for or ability to hold umbrellas," Sheldon explained.
"Right," Penny answered, "I need to go to the Emergency Room...will you drive me.'
"I don't drive," he answered.
Penny, becoming exasperated, "well, I can't drive."
"Seems we've reached an impasse," Sheldon surmised, "I could call you a cab or an ambulance."
"Owww, I can't wait that long, please drive me," she begged.
"Alright, never let it be said that Sheldon Lee Cooper ignored the pleas of a damsel in distress," he surrendered.
"No one's saying that...let's go," Penny declared.
Howard returned to the nerds campsite and reported on their neighbors, "mostly science nerds, like us, except for two not unattractive middle-school teachers who invited us to join them later."
"Cool, how old," Raj inquired.
"Oh, fifties, but well preserved," Howard related.
"Oh, menopause...nature's birth control," Raj quipped.
"Yeah, they were wearing tie-dye Grateful Dead shirts and driving a vintage VW van," Howard added.
"You can't be that hard up," Leonard asked.
"Yeah, I am," Raj admitted.
"Yep," Howard agreed, "hey they gave me this big bag of chocolate chip cookies," and he held up a large Ziploc bag stuffed with fresh cookies.
"Yeah," Leonard told them, "that's what grandmothers do," and they settled back to sample the baked goods and watch the stars.
Sheldon complained as he opened Penny's dresser drawers looking for some clothes, "I see no organizational system here whatsoever. What panties do you wear on Mondays?"
"I don't need underwear," Penny told him, sitting on her bed wrapped in the dripping shower curtain, "just shorts and a shirt."
"My mother always told me one should wear clean underpants in case one is in an accident," Sheldon informed her.
"One was already in an accident," Penny replied, rolling her eyes.
Sheldon responded, "that doesn't mean one won't be in another...especially if I'm driving."
Reaching the end of her patience, Penny yelled, "Sheldon...I need clothes."
He quickly grabbed a pair of shorts and shirt from the drawer and offered them to her, "here."
Wrinkling her cute nose, Penny asked, "seriously, those shorts with that top."
"Alright," Sheldon mumbled and reached for a different top."
"No," Penny rejected the choice; and then "no" again to his next choice. Finally, "oh that's cute," and she stood to get dressed.
"We should have you checked for a concussion," Sheldon grumbled.
"OK, you have to help me put these on...but don't look," she instructed.
"Don't look," Sheldon questioned her.
"I don't want you to see me naked," Penny stated.
"Oh that's understandable," he agreed while closing his eyes, "you may be interested to know that a prohibition against looking is well established in heroic mythology. Lot and his wife, Perseus and Medusa...they always look and it never ends well."
"Yeah that's great," Penny said, "now you have to help me get my arm into the sleeve," as she struggled to pull the shirt over her head. Standing in front of Sheldon, his eyes closed, Penny was surprised to feel his long bony fingers squeeze her naked right breast. "Is that my arm," she asked sarcastically.
Hesitantly, Sheldon admitted while continuing to fondle her tit, "it doesn't feel like an arm."
"Then maybe you should let it gooo," Penny suggested.
"Alrighty...," Sheldon complied, withdrawing his hands and wiping them on his shirt.
The trio of stargazers was beginning to feel the effects of the "hippie cookies" as they relaxed in their sling chairs and Leonard remarked, "the stars are so pretty."
"Way up in the world so high, like little diamonds in the sky," Howard stated.
"Oh dude, that's so beautiful," Raj complimented him, "you should write that down. It's almost as if you can feel the earth moving."
"Oh...I can feel it," Leonard agreed, "hey, we should take these cookies home and share them with Penny and Sheldon. Penny loves cookies."
"Yeah even Sheldon eats cookies," Howard agreed, "they must be approved food on his planet."
"You're right Leonard...let's go," Raj shouted, getting up and grabbing the bag of hash-laced cookies. They all ran down the hill and piled into the car. It would be morning before they remembered that they had left all of their equipment and laptops in the desert. The return trip took three times as long because none of them could concentrate on the road ahead; their minds kept drifting as well as the vehicle.
The trip to the hospital interminable as Sheldon complained and had to adjust every accessory in the vehicle. When he inquired about the passenger-side mirror, Penny informed him that it was in a parking lot in Hollywood. In pain, she urged him to go faster, "warp speed Mr. Spock."
"Spock did not pilot the Enterprise, he was the Science Officer," he informed her, "but if he had been piloting the ship I'm sure he would have pulled into a service station if the engine light was on. By the way, why do you have the Chinese symbol for "soup" tattooed on your right buttock?"
"It' not "soup," it's "courage," Penny corrected him.
"I beg your pardon, but I am quite familiar with the Chinese language," he in turn corrected her.
"Hey, wait a minute, how do you know what's on my right buttock," she inquired.
"I told you," Sheldon admitted, "there is a long history of the hero peeking."
While filling out the required paperwork at the hospital, Sheldon could not help himself from staring at Penny's chest. Her bra-less breasts wobbled inside her shirt and knowing she wasn't wearing any underwear seemed to inexplicably excite him. He tried to dismiss his novel feelings by being particularly logical, but the stirrings kept surfacing. When they arrived back at Penny's apartment, she was in a much better mood due to the medications that had been prescribed. "Now remember you've been given powerful pain medication and a muscle relaxant," Sheldon reminded her, "so don't operate any heavy machinery. Try not to choke on your own drool," he added as he turned to leave.
Penny, completely impaired by the strong medications, objected, "wait, you have to help me get into bed." Giggling uncontrollably, she repeated, "Sheldon has to get me into bed...I bet you never thought you'd hear me say that."
"Yes," Sheldon replied drolly, " the candor of your drug addled humor knows no bounds," and they headed to Penny's bedroom; but not before she snatched a bottle of wine from her coffee table. As she walked, she slipped a few more muscle relaxant tablets into the bottle.
"You know it's not a good idea to mix alcohol with prescription medication," Sheldon scolded her, "it says so right on the pill bottle."
"Sweetie, you take your pills your way and I'll take mine my way," Penny informed him as she stumbled into her bedroom. "You know people think you're this weird robot-man who is so annoying all the time, and you totally are, but you're like that movie Wall-e at the end, and you can save a plant and get fat people out of their floaty chairs." She sat on the edge of her bed, kicked off her flip-flops and swung her legs onto the bed.
"That's a fairly labored comparison but I appreciate the sentiment behind it," he thanked her as he pulled the covers over her long shapely legs, once again noticing how her breasts swayed beneath her flimsy shirt.
"Sing Soft-Kitty to me," she requested, referring to the children's song Sheldon's grandmother sang to him when he was sick.
"Soft-Kitty is for when you're sick," he objected, "you're not sick."
"Injured and drugged is a kind of sick," Penny pouted and patted the bed next to her.
Reluctantly sitting beside her, Sheldon began, "soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...."
She interrupted him and suggested, "let's sing it as a round...I'll start and then you come in. Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purrr, purrr, purrr." When he didn't join in, Penny threatened, "I've got all night Sheldon." He immediately started singing and actually enjoyed their duet.
However after several rounds of the soothing song, Sheldon beseeched her, "aren't you sleepy yet. What will it take to get you to fall asleep?"
Penny took a couple swigs from the wine bottle and declared, "my shoulder really doesn't hurt at all. You know the doctor said there was really no damage, just some pain because the muscles and stuff had gotten stretched when it popped out of place." She proceeded to remove her sling and tell Sheldon, "you need to give me a massage so I can relax and go to sleep." The wine and additional muscle relaxants were quickly taking affect as she tugged her blouse over her head and turned over on her stomach, "there is a bottle of baby oil on the night stand...let's go...chop, chop," she giggled.
Having seen her naked breasts for a second time that evening, Sheldon was stunned into silence as he automatically reached for the baby oil. Being careful not to splatter the oil on his Batman t-shirt, he squirted baby oil on his hands, rubbed then together and placed them firmly between Penny's creamy shoulders. Leaning over her prone body, Sheldon began to rub her back in circular, overlapping motions, enjoying the feel of her smooth skin against his girlish hands. It was only natural for the obsessive Sheldon to attempt to spread oil on every inch of exposed skin, and he massaged Penny's sides all the way down to where her ample breasts flattened out beneath her. "Ohhh, that feels so good Sheldon," she moaned, her body wriggling.
Sheldon was startled when she raised her torso ever so slightly, allowing him to caress her incredibly soft breasts, gently massaging baby oil into her wonderful mounds. Her nipples felt like gumdrops as his slender fingers roamed across them. "Oh Sheldon you have magic hands... like Merlin, right...wasn't he a famous wizard," she exclaimed, laying back down flat on the bed.
"Umm, yes Merlin was a mythical wizard, you made a correct analogy," Sheldon assured her," are you getting sleepy yet." Since her soft chest was no longer accessible, he continued to rub her back, running his hands down to where the top of her round ass cheeks were visible because her loose fitting shorts had been pushed down by her movements in bed.
"Do you think my ass is too big," she inquired.
"Too big for what," Sheldon asked, "you must quantify your question. It seems the perfect size for your pants...and is definitely proportional to the rest of your body; if that's what you mean."
"Oooo Sheldon you old sweet talker," Penny chuckled, "did you just pay me a compliment. Did you just say you like my ass?"
"Oh good Lord," Sheldon blushed, "I merely said it was a good size for you. Where do you come up with these ideas, and why would you ask me a question like that."
Her words were slurring slightly now and Sheldon hoped it meant she was close to napping, but she surprised him (and almost pushed him off the bed) by flipping over on her back, exposing her beautiful breasts to him for the third time that night. "Because you are the smartest person I know and I value your opinion," she informed him. If she had been more lucid, she would have realized that there was no easier way to stroke his ego than to compliment his intelligence. Reaching up to cup her own tits, she asked, "what do you think of my breasts. Leonard says they're perfect, but I think that's just because I let him play with them...and suck on them...and run his hard cock between them...I miss Leonard."
"Yes, we all do," Sheldon responded, slightly embarrassed.
"So, Mr. Merlin Wizard, what do you think of my breasts," she mumbled.
"Well the areola are a tad asymmetrical, but certainly nothing to worry about; they are also proportional to your body."
"So you like my tits," she giggled, "would you like to touch them."
Momentarily flustered, Sheldon quickly recovered, "if you mean will I massage your chest...I guess that would be acceptable." He reapplied baby oil to his hands and placed them firmly on top of Penny's magnificent 35 C breasts. They really were a work of art, and even Sheldon noticed how pink her areola and nipples were. As she lay on her back, her breasts flattened out slightly on her chest, but were incredibly firm. He massaged them in perfect circles, watching them jiggle under his touch. Sheldon had never responded to sexual stimulus like a typical male, but even he felt a stirring between his legs as he caressed Penny's wonderful tits.
"That feels so nice sweetie," she purred, "would you sing to me again."
Without even objecting, he began, "soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur...."
Suddenly they heard Penny's front door burst open and Leonard's voice, "Penny...Sheldon are you here, we tried the apartment but no one was there. We brought you some amazing cookies."
Leonard, Howard and Raj froze for a second as they heard Sheldon's voice coming from the bedroom, "happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purrr, purrr, purrr."
Their heads were already fuzzy from the cookies and they just stood there staring at each other for a couple minutes before Leonard headed for the open door of the bedroom, "Penny, are you OK." When he reached the bedroom, he saw Sheldon with his hands on Penny's naked tits as she lay back on her bed. "What the...," was all he could verbalize, as his mind was bombarded by numerous scenarios.
Penny looked over, saw Leonard standing there with his mouth open and immediately jumped out of bed, dumping Sheldon on the floor. She ran across the room with her arms out, her incredible tits bouncing, and yelling, "sweetie, my hero...you came to rescue me. How did you know I was hurt. My psychic says that soul mates just sense when something is wrong." Jumping into his arms, she smothered Leonard with kisses. Just happy to be received in that manner, Leonard returned her embrace and squeezed her perfect ass in his hands.
"Yeah, that's it...I sensed something was wrong," Leonard fibbed, "and also I brought you cookies."
Howard and Raj stuck their heads through the doorway and Raj asked, "is everything OK, we thought we heard Sheldon in here."
Penny released Leonard and went running to the door to greet them, her magnificent tits flopping against her chest, "you came to rescue me too...you guys are my heroes too."
Their eyes threatened to bulge out of their sockets as they watched the half-naked blonde goddess approach them with her arms wide. It was evident that Raj was under the influence of the cookies when he was actually able to talk to Penny, "it is so good to see you too, Penny...and I do mean see you."
She hugged him tight and then moved to Howard, throwing her arms around him and pulling him close. Without the wine and medication cocktail, she would never have even touched Howard, who she considered creepy and sleazy, but she hugged him tightly. Not wanting to seem obvious, Howard ran his hands up over her ass and hugged her waist, keeping her close to him even after she began to pull away. When she was done with her greetings, Penny returned to Leonard's side, took his hand and led him to the bed. As they sat, he finally asked, "sooo, what's been going on here."
"Oh it's a long story," Penny began and before she could continue, Sheldon interrupted:
"did someone mention cookies?"
Howard held up the bag and Sheldon snatched it, "Oh goody, goody...cookies...gimme."
"Oh if you guys are thirsty, I have wine," Penny offered, grabbing the bottle off the nightstand and handing it to Raj.
"I'll go get some glasses," he volunteered and headed toward the kitchen. When he returned he brought some empty jelly jars for glasses and poured everyone, except Sheldon, a full glass.
Munching heartily on the marijuana-laced cookies, Sheldon began, "I wouldn't drink that wine if I were...." Before he could finish his warning, everyone had gulped down the entire contents of their glass. "I don't know why I even bother," he sighed.
Penny picked her discarded sling up off the floor, kind of like a grade-school "show & tell," and began to relate the entire night's saga. Neither she nor Leonard seemed to think it was even the slightest bit out of the ordinary that she was regaling them on her adventures while completely topless. Raj and Howard were attempting to concentrate on her voice, but could not take their eyes off her magnificent breasts, that were jiggling with every move. By the time she was finished, everyone in the room was under the influence of at least muscle relaxant, wine and hippie-recipe cookies (add in strong pain killer for Penny). Sheldon's intoxication was solely due to the special cookies, but sense his system was so intolerant, he was completely impaired. "...and that's how Mr. Merlin Wizard came to the aid of a damsel in distress," Penny concluded, "and you know what, my shoulder doesn't hurt a bit...at least I can't feel it," she giggled.
As the five of them sat on the edges of Penny's bed, Leonard observed, "I think I can still feel the earth moving."
After pausing for several minutes, Penny answered, "oh sweetie I can feel it toooo."
Somewhere in his clouded brain, Leonard's maternal instinct kicked in, "Penny I think you should probably get some rest."
"Yes...that is what we were trying to do when you came to rescue me," she smiled sweetly at Leonard. "Who would like to give me a massage and sing to me," she asked.
Again, like in grade-school, four hands immediately shot into the air. Not even Sheldon was going to refuse an opportunity to put his hands on the body of this blonde goddess. "OK," Penny agreed as she scooted up the bed and slowly pushed her pink shorts down her endlessly long legs, before tossing them onto the floor, "I don't want to get oily stains on my shorts." She was now completely naked and the four men just stared as she rolled over onto her back.
"She's right you know," Sheldon confirmed, "oil stains are almost completely impossible to remove from clothing."
Turning her head to the side of her pillow, Penny instructed them, "Mr. Merlin Wizard is right; I've seen him in the laundry room on Saturday night scrubbing peanut sauce from Siam Palace off his pants. If you're going to give me a massage, you should take your clothes off too." She watched curiously as they mindlessly followed her instructions and began to shed their clothes. When the star-gazing trio took off their sneakers, sand spilled out all over her floor, but she couldn't have cared less. Penny smiled and felt a warm stirring when her Leonard shoved his pants and boxers down his legs revealing the eight inch penis that she knew so well. Leonard was the most thoughtful lover she had ever had and she knew deep inside that someday she would commit to be his spouse.
Howard, his clothes flying left and right stripped down to some ridiculous leopard-print bikini briefs and then shucked them as his hot dog sized prick sprang forth. Penny, relaxing against her soft pillow, felt her breath catch in her throat when Raj dropped his pants: his cock was absolutely enormous as it dangled between his hairy legs. It hung down to his knees and swung between them like an elephant's trunk. Penny was brought up on a Nebraska farm, and only their stud draft-horse had displayed a larger prick than Raj's. Sheldon, who would never have agreed to be naked in front on another person if he had not consumed numerous cookies, was the last to shed his clothes. His penis was shorter than Leonard's, but he made up for it in girth: it was as fat as a soda can.
They divided the remaining wine and then sat naked around the sides of the bed as Penny awaited her massage. Even Sheldon, who could have been arrested for being under the influence of cookies, passed the bottle of baby oil around; everyone generously coating their hands. Leonard and Howard each started at one of Penny's feet, and Sheldon and Raj each picked up one of Penny's "farmer man hands" and began to gently rub. Raj squirted a pool of excess oil into the hollow just above her perfect ass cheeks created by the small of Penny's back so that everyone could replenish without needing the bottle every time. "Very resourceful Raj," Sheldon complimented him, "I'm surprised I didn't think of it." Sheldon's mind was so foggy that he never even questioned why he and his friends had their hands on a naked woman.
He and Raj rubbed and massaging Penny's arms and proceeded to her smooth back, making sure to move way down her sides to her flattened breasts. Leonard and Howard had moved up past Penny's knees and were caressing her creamy thighs. Penny moaned into the pillow and involuntarily spread her wonderful legs farther apart to accommodate their hands. Howard began to knead oil into her soft and yet firm cheek and could not help saying, "Leonard you are one lucky bastard."
"Tell me something I don't know," Leonard answered, "probably the luckiest man on earth."
It was surprisingly quiet in the bedroom, about the only sound was that of oil squishing against skin, and when she heard Leonard's reply she smiled and felt a warmth spread through her nude body. As Raj and Sheldon were careful not to miss one square inch of Penny's upper torso, Leonard and Howard replenished the oil on their hands from the reserve pool and began to massage Penny's silky inner thighs. Her incredible legs were spread so far that her totally bald mound was completely on display, as well as most of her very prominent labia. They dipped their fingers between her legs, rubbing oil into her crotch and grazing her mound. Her legs spread even wider and they took turns running their slick fingers up and down her pink slit.
Leonard took the lead and let his oily middle finger separate her lips, finding more natural lubrication inside. Totally inebriated by the cookies, Leonard only wanted to sooth his poor accident victim who he loved with all his heart, and actually was quite proud to show her off incredible body; so he urged Howard to delve one of his skinny fingers through her slit. Penny's naked body shivered when she felt their fingers tickle her most sensitive area, and she casually turned over on her back, "I think it's time you massaged the other half," she coaxed.
Three of the four nerds just stared momentarily at the gorgeous nude woman laying in front of them; Sheldon was not that impressed, but he was not exactly normal. She was truly the most beautiful woman they had ever seen and suddenly remembered that they could actually put their hands on her. Raj dripped baby oil into her cute belly button, to create a reserve pool and then he and Sheldon once again started to massage her arms. It didn't take them long to advance to her shoulders and then down to her magnificent breasts. They rubbed oil all over her firm orbs, mesmerized by the way they jiggled in response to their touch. When they released them, her tits would spread out slightly on her chest, in perfect circles.
Penny thought her gumdrop nipples were going to explode as they massaged and caressed them. She looked around the bed, and even Sheldon was sporting an erection; for some reason she was reminded of toys from her childhood: Lincoln Logs. Howard and Leonard swiftly moved up her endlessly long, slender legs, working their way up to her inviting thighs. By the time they reached her crotch, Penny had spread her legs wide, silently urging them to concentrate on her pussy. Leonard gazed lovingly at her naked body and wanted nothing more than to make her feel good. He and Howard gently rubbed her plump lips until they saw a drop of her own fluid seep out and run down between her ass cheeks.
Her body was squirming almost uncontrollably as Leonard used both his hands to spread her puffy folds, exposing the vivid pink flesh of her pussy. He nodded to Howard, who slowly slid his bony index finger up inside Penny's juicy cunt. "Holy shit," she groaned when she felt her pussy being invaded. Raj and Sheldon just stopped and watched as Howard finger-fucked their blond goddess. Raj took the actions as permission to administer pleasure to the naked beauty and he leaned forward to suck on her engorged nipple. He sucked and nibbled while her body trembled and she moaned, "oh shit that's good."
Leonard leaned in between her silky legs and began to run his tongue up and down her slit, beside Howard's finger. Almost immediately, his face was flooded with her fluids and he sheepishly explained to the rest of the nerds, "Penny's a squirter." As he continued to lap up her cum, Leonard nodded to Howard, "aren't you going to help me." Without waiting for Leonard to change his mind, Howard withdrew his finger and wedged his face next to Leonard's between Penny's legs. They each licked one side of her slit, cleaning her crotch like a couple of kittens. Howard boldly inserted his tongue into her pussy and used it to scoop her juices into his mouth.
"Ohhhh, myyyy," she groaned, her ass wriggling against the bed.
Raj was nibbling and sucking her right nipple and urged Sheldon to join him, "come on Sheldon...try it...you'll like it."
"Well it seem unsanitary, but I'll give it a try," Sheldon conceded, gingerly licking and then attaching him lips to Penny's left gumdrop. Coming up for air, he admitted, "there is something quite soothing about sucking on her breast."
Penny, being sexually manipulated by four men gasped, "Leonard, sweetie, you know there is one thing that gets me so exhausted that I fall asleep."
"Yes I do, my angel," Leonard smiled broadly, "and I think we can accommodate that." Explaining, Leonard informed them, "after a good lovemaking session, she always falls asleep. Will you all help me get her to sleep?"
Raj's eyes bulged when the implication finally registered in his brain, " when you say help you...do you mean...?"
"That's exactly what he means," Penny assured them, spreading her legs until her feet hung off the edges of her bed. It was a lifelong dream come true for three of the nerds: an absolutely gorgeous blond, totally naked, her hair spread out on the pillow and her marvelous legs splayed far apart begging them to fuck her.
Leonard crawled up between her legs, "if you don't mind, I'll be first," as he rubbed his crown up and down between her slit.
"Oh sweetie," Penny urged, "fuck your little Penny." Like he had done many times before, Leonard wedged his head between her pouty lips and then just pushed slowly and steadily forward until he was buried in her hot, juicy cunt.
"Oh my God, Penny gasped, "that's what I'm talking about. You know just how to do me." Leonard ground his pelvis into hers, braced his hands against the bed on each side of her torso and began to slowly withdraw his cock until just the head was still inside her. The only part of his body touching hers was his penis, and it seemed to heighten the sensation for Penny, "fuck me baby...fuck my little pussy." She was so impaired by the various medications, wine and cookies that her erogenous zones seemed even more sensitive, and when Leonard swiftly shoved his length back into her hole, she exploded, "hooolllyyyy shit...fuck me baby."
Not wanting to be left out, even though they were enjoying the show, Raj and Sheldon (following Raj's lead) placed their hard-ons in Penny's outstretched hands and her fingers automatically closed around them. It took some coaxing, because she was having difficulty concentrating on more than one thing, but she soon started to move her hands up and down, jerking their cocks. This was a totally novel experience for Sheldon and he exclaimed, "good Lord, this is quite enjoyable...no wonder Leonard spends so much time over here."
Howard, not willing to let this opportunity with Penny go to waste, kneeled on the bed next to her pillow and offered his "hot dog" to her heavenly face. Like a baby bird waiting to be fed, Penny reflexively opened her mouth and Howard slid his prick between her ruby lips and into her warm mouth. Closing her lips around his shaft, she sucked his entire length into her mouth and licked the underside with her tongue. "Holy shit...Penny's giving me a blowjob," the tipsy nerd screamed in his head.
Leonard reached up and began to knead her marvelous tits, rolling her gumdrop nipples between his fingers as he thrust into her pussy. "My God she's beautiful," was all he could think as he rammed his cock in and out of her juicy cunt. He began to fuck her as fast as he could, his cock sawing in and out of her, until he pinched both nipples as he gushed his load into her hole. "I love you Penny," he blurted out in his inebriated state. As he pumped his cum deep into her belly, Leonard was suddenly afraid: she had told him before that she wasn't ready to hear that and he knew he was in for a scolding. But he was shocked when he swore he heard her mumble, "I love you too;" but it was pretty hard to tell what she was saying with a mouthful of cock.
Her mumbling sent Howard over the edge and he emptied the contents of his balls down the back of Penny's throat. Beginning to choke, she spit his prick out and sat up to look down between her legs as Leonard was withdrawing, "noooo, don't stop."
She looked so sad and disappointed that Leonard declared, "well, she doesn't look sleepy yet...so who's next."
Stumbling and nearly falling in his haste to take Leonard's place, Raj pulled his prick from her hand and bounded to the foot of the bed. Leonard, showing some concern, "OK Raj, but I'm afraid in your state that you might hurt Penny, so why don't you lay down and she can climb on you. That way she can go at her own pace."
"Fine with me," Raj agreed as he immediately lay down beside Penny. Feeling an emptiness between her legs, Penny crawled down to the foot of the bed and then looked at Raj. If her mind had not been so cloudy, she probably would have been extremely apprehensive, but she just giggled as she stared at his gigantic cock. She thought it looked like a flagpole had sprouted in the middle of her bed. It was over twelve inches in length and as big around as a soup can. His dark purple crown was the size of a tennis ball as he lay back and stroked it. Straddling Raj's prone body, Penny grasped his pole and licked it from the base to the head, like she would tackle a giant lollipop. Knowing she could never get it in her mouth, she raised up on her knees, rubbing the crown against her slit.
A mixture of her fluids and Leonard's semen dribbled onto Raj's cock-head as she eased it between her plump lips, feeling them spreading wider than they had ever been. Slowly bending her knees, Penny felt increased pressure at her opening, splitting her slit until his crown finally penetrated her. "Oooooo," she gasped, feeling her entrance spread, and she began to bend her knees even more. As each fat inch penetrated her, she could feel her tunnel spreading to accommodate it. Her cunt had never been stretched that wide before and the sensation was exquisite: the more cock she had inside her...the more she craved.
Thinking that it must all be inside her, Penny looked down between her thighs and saw that only about half of Raj's log had penetrated her. Throwing caution to the wind, Penny suddenly threw her knees out to the side and sat on Raj's lap; his enormous cock impaling her in one motion. "Oh my fucking God," she screamed, her head rolling from side to side. It felt like someone had shoved their arm up her cunt: it was painful for a split second, and then pleasure triumphed. Every inch of her pussy was stretched farther than it had ever been and Penny's body trembled in orgasm, "oh my God...oh my God...fuck me...fuck me."
If his mind had been clear, Leonard would have probably... no definitely, been jealous; but he was only concerned with making his wounded angel feel better, and this was definitely taking her mind off her shoulder. Penny's whole body quivered as her juices dripped down onto Raj's scrotum when she started to raise up again. The sensation was incredible as she felt the entire length of her tunnel shrinking when Raj's giant cock withdrew. Leonard bent down to get a closer look of her labia gripping Raj's pole when she rose up on her knees. Penny stared down between her legs and it looked like she was sitting on a fence post and she wondered how in hell that much cock could fit inside her.
She began to rise up and sit down in a steady rhythm, fucking herself on Raj's monstrous cock. He joined in and slammed up into her cunt when she sat down. Leonard could not believe how excited he was watching his beautiful girlfriend being fucked by a gigantic cock, her tits flopping against her chest. He was totally amazed that her pussy would stretch that far, as he watched Raj's pole disappearing up into her. "Oh my fucking God," she screamed, "fuck me...fuck me...jam your fucking cock into me." She lay down against Raj's chest, giving him another angle, this time his shaft was scraping against her swollen clit.
Howard was tiring of just watching this gorgeous blonde being fucked and now with her ass in the air, he got a wicked idea. Squirting his "hot dog" penis with baby oil, he climbed up on the bed behind Penny and signaled his intention to Leonard. Leonard gave him the traditional shoulder shrug meaning "I don't know," and then the "thumbs up" as if to say, "you can try it at your own risk." Howard leaned forward, spread Penny's perfect ass cheeks with his hands and licked his tongue all the way from her slit to her back. Feeling the additional stimulation behind her, Penny stopped riding Raj and looked back over her shoulder. Seeing his oily prick poised at her ass hole, she merely leaned farther into Raj's chest, giving Howard a better target.
Her ass hole was incredibly tight, being crowded by the giant cock in her pussy, but Howard's rod was so slick (and so slender) that he quite easily slid past her sphincter ring and into her ass. "Wow that's tight," Howard remarked, "tighter than Batman's codpiece."
Raj and Penny had stopped to allow Howard to maneuver and the feeling of his cock sliding into her, joining Raj, was indescribable. Penny had never been double penetrated before, and had only had anal sex a couple of times, so this was a unique experience for her. As soon as Howard had fully entered her ass, he and Raj began to fuck her holes in unison. Feeling their cocks filling her holes, Penny screeched, "oh my God...oh my God...fuck my fucking holes."
Leonard was mesmerized watching two cocks disappearing up into his girlfriend. Sheldon stood beside him and commented, "that just doesn't seem natural;" and yet Leonard could not help but notice that Sheldon's prick was as stiff as his. Leonard bent down and began to kiss Penny as her body shook from the force of two pricks being jammed into her. She responded and threw her arms around his neck, mashing their lips together. Suddenly realizing the situation, she giggled into his mouth at the thought of kissing her boyfriend while being fucked by two different men.
"I can't wait any longer," Raj declared, slamming his anaconda up into Penny's cunt.
"Me either," Howard agreed as he drove forward, burying his prick in her ass, his scrotum slapping against her pale cheeks.
"Hooollyyy shit," Penny groaned as she felt her holes expanding as they flooded her with their seed. It felt like her belly was on fire as they pumped her full of their cum. Her pussy lips made slurping sounds as their semen forced its way out of her, dribbling down between Raj's ass cheeks and soaking her sheets.
This was the most physical activity Howard had endured since high school gym class, and he was breathing heavily as his shrinking prick slid out of Penny's wonderful ass. He sat on the side of her bed catching his breath as she hopped off of Raj's log, grasped it in her hands and began jerking it back to attention. "It doesn't look like you're quite ready for some sleep," Leonard stated the obvious, rubbing her shoulders and kissing the nape of her long neck.
"Nope...not yet," she answered, stroking Raj's pole, "I think I need my boyfriend to make love to me again."
Leonard could never admit it to Penny, but it made his cock even harder when she called him her boyfriend. She was his dreams come true, and although she obviously already knew he was a big nerd, he didn't want her to think he was a total nerd. Back in high school Leonard would never have even dared to look at a beautiful girl like Penny; and if he had, he probably would have been beaten-up by the girl's boyfriend. She made him so happy he felt like he would burst.
"But first, Penny continued, "what do you think Sheldon; do you want to fuck me? Do you want to know what it feels like to put your penis into my vagina? Come on...everyone else has cum in me."
But even inebriated, Sheldon was still Sheldon, "that's precisely the point. I don't want to put my penis in there where everyone else has been. There is no telling what germs may be lingering in there. Thank you for the offer though...very thoughtful."
Raj, having just fucked the girl he had been dreaming about since she became Sheldon's neighbor, was in nirvana as she nonchalantly stroked his pole back to full staff. He didn't know what she had in mind for him, and didn't care as long as she kept her hand on him. Penny reached out, grasped Leonard's hard-on like it was a handle, and pulled him to the edge of the bed. "Get up here lover," she stated in a throaty whisper, "I'll be ready for you in a minute." She scooted back, again straddling the eager Raj, this time with her back to him. Raising up on her knees over his lap, she reached between her legs, grabbed his pole and positioned it against her parted slit. Cum oozed out of her hole and coated his huge crown like melted ice cream. Then she just sat down on his lap, his immense cock disappearing into her hole, seemingly like magic.
"Oh my fucking God that's big," she squealed as he spread her wide open again. Penny just kicked her long, slender legs out and sat there enjoying his cock inside her, a wide smile on her face. Raj, an even bigger grin on his face, grasped her trim waist in his hands and began to lift her up and down while he thrust up into her pussy.
"God she's beautiful," Leonard thought as he watched Raj's cock sliding in and out of her stretched pussy, her incredible tits flopping up and down, slapping against her chest.
"OK, stop Raj," she commanded, "Leonard get up here." Raj was pouting because he thought she was done with him, but he was mistaken. Leonard crawled on his knees up between two pairs of legs until he was face to face with his blonde beauty, and then kissed her passionately. When they broke, Penny stated, "I want your cock in me." Leonard looked at her quizzically and she elaborated, "I want you both to fuck me together...I want to feel two cocks in my pussy."
The logistical side of Leonard revealed itself even in his impaired condition, "is that even possible."
"We're going to find out," Penny stated very matter-of -factly, "if my vagina is designed to give birth, then is should accommodate two cocks...fuck me baby. I want you now."
"Yes, but Penny when a woman gives birth, natural hormones are released to aid in dilating her cervix...," Sheldon began, but was interrupted by Penny.
Penny lay back on Raj's hairy chest, splayed her legs as far as they would go, reached down with both hands and used her fingers to spread her lips as wide as she could get them. Both she and Raj raised their heads, looking down between their legs as Leonard pressed his crown against her wide spread slit. Making sure he collected some of the juices leaking out of Penny's pussy, he began to push forward; the underside of his prick sliding against Raj's. Penny pulled her lips wider as Leonard attempted to force his way inside her.
"Go Leonard, go," Howard, now standing beside the bed, acted as a cheerleader.
Penny, knowing her slit was reaching it's limit, urged her boyfriend, "come on baby...fuck your little Penny...I need you inside me." Leonard actually grunted as he shoved forward and his crown slipped through her entrance into her cunt. Releasing her lips, Penny gasped, "hooollyyy fucking shit," when she felt the walls of her pussy stretching even farther than she thought possible. "It's OK baby...do it...jam your fucking cock into me." Aroused beyond belief, Leonard shoved his whole body forward, forcing the entire length of his cock into Penny's stretched out cunt.
Howard just stood next to them with his mouth open, moving his head closer to Penny's crotch to get a better look. Sheldon, still sitting at the head of the bed absentmindedly stroking his prick, remarked, "now I KNOW that's not normal."
Penny's eyes bulged and she began to hyperventilate as the two cocks began to fuck her.
Her cunt was stretched so tight that every single nerve ending was being stimulated simultaneously by their cocks. They were scraping her G-spot and her clitoris at the same time as they withdrew from her tunnel. She tried to scream but the only sound emanating from her mouth was, "aaahhhhh." Her body thrashed and twitched between them as she experienced one orgasm after another, her cunt muscles gripping their cocks even tighter.
Leonard and Raj had already cum in her, so their stamina was seemingly endless as their pricks combined to form one monstrously huge cock slamming in and out of Penny's hole. "Popping" sounds could be heard because their cocks combined to form a vacuum in her tunnel, closing off her entrance completely. It felt to Penny like someone had stuffed their leg up her pussy, "oh my fucking God...fuck me...fuck me...stretch my little fucking pussy." She was in a constant state of orgasm as she could feel every inch of their cocks sliding in and out of her; stretching her farther with every stroke. They showed no mercy, thrusting hard into her hole, their balls slapping against her together.
Leonard had the best view; he could see both cocks slipping in and out of Penny's cunt, watching her body wriggle between them, her magnificent tits flopping against her chest. "I love this woman," he thought, "and I love watching a cock sliding in and out of her incredible pussy."
He leaned forward, licked her right areola and then began nibbling on her gumdrop nipple. Her body immediately jerked and she moaned, "fuck me...fuck me...fuck me...I need your cum in me...fill me...cum in me."
Raj and Leonard needed it too; they needed to shoot their loads as deep into her belly as they could. Almost as if by telepathy, they shoved their cocks as hard and deep into Penny's cunt as they could and simultaneously began to pump her full of their cum. It was as if a fire-hose had been turned on inside her, and Penny wrapped her arms and legs around Leonard, locking him in place as they filled her cunt with their semen. It was as if her pussy was on fire and she saw little sparks of light in front of her eyes as the muscles in her cunt went into a spasm. She was squeezing Leonard so hard he was finding breathing difficult as he pumped every drop of his cum deep into her belly.
"Oh my fucking God, I love your fucking cocks," she moaned, gradually releasing her grip on Leonard. All three were perspiring profusely as they untangled; Leonard's shriveling cock slipping out Penny's hole. She rolled off of Raj, his snake sliding out of her pussy, and lay on her back next to him. Exhausted, but surprisingly not sleepy, Penny reached for the wine bottle on the nightstand. Finding it empty, she asked Howard to get another bottle from the living room. She sat up and leaned against the headboard, her legs splayed. Everyone in the room could not help notice that her slit was no longer a slit; her hole was as wide open as a soup can's opening, and white fluid was dribbling out in a stream.
Leonard thought, "the inside of her pussy is the most vivid shade of pink I have ever seen. Even her insides are incredible."
The empty bottle still in her hand, Penny exclaimed, "an empty bottle is only good for one thing," and she proceeded, without hesitation, to insert the neck of the bottle into her hole and push the entire length up into her pussy. "Ohhh...I love having something hard inside me."
When Howard returned with a full bottle, he saw what had taken place and whined, "oh man, what did I miss...that's not fair."
"Howard, thanks for the wine," Penny stated graciously, "would you like to play with the empty?"
Jumping onto the bed beside the naked blonde beauty, Howard replied, "would I." Handing Penny the full one, Howard reached between her long legs and gently grasped the very bottom of the bottle with his fingertips. He couldn't believe it, the entire bottle was inside her; her puffy lips attempting to close around it.
Penny took a couple swigs of wine, then leaned back and watched Howard get a grasp on the bottle protruding from her cunt. Slowly and gently, he began to fuck Penny with the bottle. The bottle was no longer green; it was now coated with a combination of white, sticky fluids as he slid it in and out of her pussy. It slid in and out of her stretched out cunt with incredible ease. Penny slid a pillow under her delectable ass to give Howard a better angle as he fucked her with the long-necked wine bottle. "Oh God that feels good Howard," she groaned as he increased the pace, the bottle now blurred as he stuffed it into her hole. "Fuck me Howie...fuck me," she begged, reaching up to fondle her own magnificent tits.
Seeing this, Leonard and Raj stopped being just spectators, climbed onto the bed on either side of the blond beauty and each took a rosy pink gumdrop in their mouth. Her nipples were very sensitive and Penny's cunt gushed around the glass intruder, making another wet spot on her bed. Howard immediately pulled the bottle out and drank whatever fluids had squirted into it, licking his lips when finished.
Leaning back against the headboard, Penny again asked Sheldon, "are you sure you don't want to fuck me; you will probably never get another chance."
"No thank you,' he simply replied.
"Well how about a blow job then," she suggested, "I want to reward Mr. Merlin Wizard for all the help today."
"Are you insane," Sheldon began, "are you aware that the human mouth is a cesspool of germs and bacteria.
"I am now," Penny surrendered, "well how about if you at least let me jerk you off; you seemed to enjoy that."
"You know, it actually was quite pleasurable...alright," he finally agreed, stepping forward until she could reach his stiff penis. Wrapping her fingers around its girth, Penny began to stroke Sheldon's cock with one hand, while fondling his scrotum with the other. Leonard, seeing her wonderful legs still splayed, and watching the combined cum drool out of her wide spread hole got an idea. He crawled up between her creamy thighs, cupped his thumb inside his other fingers and with virtually no resistance stuffed his entire hand, wrist deep, up into Penny's cunt.
Taken by surprise, Penny squealed, "oh my God, that's amazing." Involuntarily she squeezed Sheldon's prick and he began to pump it into her hand, his cum flying through the air. She opened her mouth wide and instructed him, "aim for my mouth sweetie." He did, but her entire face was soon dripping with Sheldon's first non-nocturnal orgasm as he pumped stream after stream of sticky semen onto her beautiful face. Penny had no idea if Sheldon had ever had an adolescent wet-dream, or if this was actually the very first time he had ejaculated, but judging by the copious amount of cum...it might have been.
He didn't shout out or moan as he pumped into her hand; the only sound he made was a meek, "oh my," while his bony body shivered. As soon as he was done, Sheldon pulled his withering prick from Penny's grasp and began searching the clothes-strewn floor for his trousers.
Penny relaxed back into her pillows as Leonard gingerly slid his hand up into her juicy cunt, fist-fucking her for the first time in her life. Extending his fingers inside her, he tickled and scraped five different spots in her tunnel simultaneously. Howard and Raj seemed hypnotized while watching Leonard's wrist slipping in and out of her smooth mound. Penny reached up and raked her fingernails across her incredible tits, giving them the idea of how to help Leonard get Penny off. They each attached their mouth to one of her gumdrop nipples while kneading her fleshy breasts. Her body quivered and Penny screeched, "oh my God that's incredible...fuck me baby...fuck me...jam you hand up my cunt."
Raj and Howard bit down on her hard nipples and Leonard twisted his fist inside her cunt as he leaned forward and ground her swollen clit between his teeth. "Hoollllyyy fucking shit...aaahhhhh," she screamed as her entire body thrashed against the bed, soaking Leonard's hand.
Watching her collapse against the pillows, Leonard carefully slipped his hand out of her pussy and licked her cream off his fingers; never even considering the other fluids inside her. Howard and Raj, sensing the evenings festivities had come to a close,began searching for their clothes. When Leonard looked up at Penny, he saw that she was suddenly fast asleep; or had passed out from exhaustion.
He immediately got a fresh towel from her bathroom and lovingly began to clean her up; wiping the semen off her face and crotch. He even struggled to change the bed sheets; moving her wonderful naked body from side to side as he worked. Sheldon, being Sheldon, quickly tidied up the bedroom and went across the hall to sleep. Leonard advised Howard and Raj that they should probably go and that he was going to stay with Penny in case she woke up and needed anything, or her shoulder was in pain. "That wine seems to have really affected us, so maybe you guys should crash at my apartment...just don't bother Sheldon. One of you can have my bed and the other the sofa...just don't let Sheldon catch you on his spot," Leonard laughed.
When they had all gone, Leonard made sure there was a bottle of water bedside, and then crawled naked into bed to snuggle with the love of his life. The amazing aspect of the evening was that the next morning, none of the participants would remember exactly what happened...not even Sheldon. Penny knew she had a sore pussy and faux-scolded Leonard for taking advantage of her when she was impaired by her medications. It didn't stop them from having a morning love-making session though.
Sometime in the afternoon, Howard called and asked Leonard if their equipment was in his car, and they ended up making an unscheduled trip into the desert.
(Thanks for reading my story. I know it's not perfect but remember, it's just for fun. Comments are always welcome. )